Happy 70th Birthday Mom

Ok, so this post is a couple weeks late, but my mom never reads my blog, and she got this tribute on her birthday, so there :P.

On Feb. 2 my mom celebrated her 70th birthday. It was a partial surprise party. She knew about the party and invited people who lived locally, but she did not know that she had some relatives coming in. Her brother and sister came from Nebraska and Texas, and my brother Carl and his wife came in from Texas. She was surprised each time one of them showed up. It was highly enjoyable.

It was so much fun throwing the party because my mom is very much a behind the scenes person, never out in front. She has never made a big deal of her birthday or any other holiday, so we decided to do it for her. 70 is a milestone because she is the first in her generation to reach it. Thankfully, she is still in good health.



"Wives, in the same way be submissive to your husbands so that, if any of them do not believe the word, they may be won over without words by the behavior of their wives, 2when they see the purity and reverence of your lives. Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as braided hair and the wearing of gold jewelry and fine clothes. Instead, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God's sight." (1 Peter 3:1-4)

Every time I hear that passage I think of my mom, because she has lived it out, and here example and love is the biggest reason that all four of her children are Christians. She has that gentle and quiet spirit that has brought a steady consistant strength to our lives. My mom is patient, faithful, loving, forgiving, and wise. I am blessed to have her as a mother.



These are some things that my mom and dad have taught me that I am tremendously thankful for:

All people are equal-I grew up in a home that knew no racism or classism. It wasn't until I moved to Tennessee in third grade that I even knew there was such a thing.

A very secure marriage-The idea of divorce was never on our minds. I never felt insecure about my parent's relationship. My father (in the picture above) passed away when he was 69, and they had been married for 30 years. My parents fulfilled their marriage vow.

I always had a parent home-My mom was at home until I started school, and when she went back to work, my father retired, so he was there. I am so thankful for that now.



College educated parents-When they were growing up, most kids dropped out of school to work with their families. But both my parents graduated high school. My dad got an associates degree from Freed and my mom got a bachelors from Harding. Now all four of their children are college graduates.

A traveling family-Every summer all 6 of us would pile into the car and go somewhere. I remember at age 5 we took a 3 week trip out west. We saw the Grand Canyon, the Golden Gate bridge, the Pacific Ocean (which I thought was funny because despite living in New Jersey at the time, I saw that ocean before the Atlantic) and several other spots. We usually visited my dads family in Tennessee or my mom's in the midwest. I learned how to travel, how to know directions, and I got exposed very early to other cultures. That is what we used our money on as a family, and there was no better thing.

We did not have much money-I am very thankful for this now. We didn't have a lot of extras. It wasn't until we moved to TN in 87 that we had a dryer, microwave, dishwasher, and cable. Part of that time things were really tight, but I always had what I needed. And I had a family that loved me. It taught me the value of things, but also the inimportance of things. I am so glad I did not have everything I wanted.



They let me try new things-They supported me in any good activity I wanted to do. They let me decide who I was. They let me be outgoing and adventurous. They let me go on any church trip, whether it was up the road or to Texas, or to Costa Rica. Distance wasn't an issue. When I was 17, my mom let me drive my friend JR and myself to camp. If it was a good thing to do, she let me do it. She let me chose my own college without restrictions. She has never pressured me to be "near home." Her response when I was asking her about moving to California was "if your going for the gospel, you have my full support." She let me explore and grow and experience with the foundation of Christ she helped lay.

They were honest and hardworking-I can find no hypocrisy in my mom. She lives out what she says, and they worked for what they had. They lived honestly, not taking advantage of others, or talking bad about others (I cannot remember gossip in my home, that is another significant blessing).

We were always at church-If the doors were open we were there. Church was what was most important, and they modeled that for me.



There are also a few stories that I remember fondly:

One of the best compliments I ever recieved when I was younger (probably junior high) was driving home from church one day, my mom told me that I was elder material. She gave me a blessing. She believed I was going to make a difference in the kingdom. It didn't mean that much to me than, it means a lot to me now.

I remember her reading the Bible with me when I was learning to read. We had an NIV and we would read a heading each night. It taught me early to love and respect the Word.

I only ever remember getting in trouble for something I didn't do twice. But considering the things I got away with, I don't think I can be too bitter. The funniest one was that my oldest two siblings worked, and they would buy some goodies and put them on top of the fridge. It was forbidden for my sister Karen and I. A couple times Karen took some stuff and we both got in trouble. It was so unfair! But if I'm going to get in trouble, I might as well get the goodies. Sure enough, the one time I am stealing from the stash, my mom walks in and catches me read-handed.

This is odd, but I cannot think of any "mom sayings" my mom has. I can finish none of her sentences, which probably saved my behind on a couple of occasions, because I would have.

One time I had the grand idea that my parents should divide all the family money and give each of us the same amount to buy our own food and other things. Of course I wanted to buy junk food. Instead of telling me how ridiculous this idea was, she sat me down and we went over family finances for the whole evening. Once I saw how much everything cost, my only question was "How do we pay for it all?" I changed my mind on the allowance thing.

Truthfully, I can only think of twice where she really lost it, and many many more opportunities I provided for her where she could have. I will not go into details because it would embarrass her, and hurt her feelings. But on both occasions all I remember thinking was "What have I done to make my mom respond like that?" I knew I did something bad. But also on both occasions, my mom apologized to me. She didn't need to, because I deserved it, but she still did.

But the single most vivid teaching moment she gave me was this: In the summer of 94, my father passed away, and then shortly after, both of my sisters tell us that they are pregnant. Neither of them is married. I remember complaining to my mom is some kind of 15 year old self-righteous state that she should do something to really punish my sisters. This is not how our family does things after all. She looked at me and with kindness and firmness said, "You can't go back and change the past, you can only deal with what is. I'm going to love my daughters and I want to provide the best home I can for my grandchildren." Something in my heart opened that night. For the first time I really understood forgiveness and grace, and that God has the same for me. It was an epiphany moment like none other I have ever had. My mom taught me about the nature of God's love that night. A couple years later, both of my sisters gave their lives back to Christ, and my mom's example had much to do with that.

This is the last photo I can find that includes all 6 of us. I was in 6th grade at the time.



I will be able to get some from the party that shows us all now. Here's the last one I can find with all of us, we've sense added Macie.



And because most of you have never seen my dad, here is one of my parents a couple years before my father passed away.



It was a blast watching my mom for the party. She really enjoyed it, and it was great being able to make her feel special. She deserves even more.